About a year ago, I was brushing my girls hair after a shower. I asked them to look in the mirror and name one thing they liked about themselves. I was floored that they couldn’t. They actually even got upset.
I know the things to not say in front of them, and I always compliment them too. I don’t put myself down in front of them (sadly I do in my head) but I don’t pat myself on the back either. I always feel like I can do better, and I’m the worst at accepting compliments. However, it’s not just about what we say. It’s also about what we don’t.
So I did. I complimented things about myself over and over until they started to giggle. Finally they each picked something about each other. They found that easier to start. Then they found things about themselves. Then we went into things we’re good at and we found it hard to stop. Soon we were in fits of laughter because one fessed up to loving her toes. Lol.
We decided to do this more often. Even though I was on a quest for them, I found it was good for me too. It’s too easy to focus on the negative all the time.
Even at 34 I’m still learning that.
Hopefully this new process is working. At least it appears to be when my youngest writes messages like this for me to find.